Ponce de Leon, having reached his twilight years, decides to write a narrative telling of his exploits and adventures. He begins Writing the Memoir, but finds he is having difficulty conjuring poetic language and recalling unpleasant memories. He drinks some wine, which makes him perilously candid about an affair he had with one of the many Local Virgins he encountered in his early years in Florida. After sobering up, he realizes the document he is working on will ruin his reputations, so he throws it into the Atlantic Ocean. The manuscript sinks to the bottom of the sea where it is received by the dolphins of The Great Cetaceous Society. Years before, Ponce de Leon had tossed the love child of his secret affair into that same deep ocean, and these same dolphins had raised that bastard human as their own. With the mysterious child’s lineage now finally discovered, the dolphins decide the boy, Delian Ponzales, must travel to the Island of Florida to find his parents. Unfortunately, Delian gets lost on the way and finds himself stranded on Pig Island instead. Delian attempts to win the pigs over by introducing himself in song (My Name is Delian) but to no avail. Fortunately, the manacing pigs are scared away by the explosions of rifle fire in the distance. Delian becomes fast friends with the one remaining pig, just before that pig is shot and killed by another rifle shot. The man responsible for the slaughter is none other than Ponce de Leon. After a brief argument over the rights of man over the beasts of the field, Ponce and Delian realize they are father and son, and rejoice in song (You Are Related To Me). This reunion is cut short by another murder. The Crone’s Apprentice (played by Anna Oxygen) shoots Ponce de Leon with a poison-dipped dart. The Apprentice tries to convince Delian to come with her to meet his mother, The Old Crone, but Delian balks. “Stop Your Protests and do not debate me!” she insists, and eventually he decides to go with her. We find The Old Crone seated deep in the everglades, and she laments to herself. “I Sing My Regrets to the Egrets” she moans, and her sorry song touches Delian’s heart. Mother and son are reunited and all seems well. So well, in fact, that The Old Crone dies of happiness, right there in Delian’s arms. It is too much for the boy to take. Finding his father and mother and losing them both to death in the same day! He vows to build a Fountain of Youth; a monument to the idea of living forever and not coming to terms with your mortality (All of Me / All of You). A magnificent kingdom is to be built on this ignorant foundation, and that kingdom still stands today on The Island of Florida!
John Hogan plays Ponce de Leon & Delian Ponzales on all tracks except on “You Are Related To Me” where Brian Randolph plays Delian Ponzales.
Anna Oxygen plays The Crone’s Apprentice in “Stop Your Protests”. Jessica Zalenko plays The Old Crone in “I Sing My Regrets to the Egrets”.
Ponce de Leon is John Hogan lead voice and guitar, Greg McKenna on keyboards, guitar and technology, David Reich on bass and vocals.
Ponce De Leon PartyBack: JonathonButt, Audrey Chan, Carrie Collins, Brian Randolph.
Jonathan Hambright played drums on “Writing the Memoir” and “The Great Cetaceous Society”.“Local Virgins” featured Mike Gunn chanting and Dave Flynn screaming “Leon!”
Drums on “Memoir” and “Cetaceous” recorded by Wyatt Tuzo. All vocals & various guitar solos and sound effects were recorded and engineered by A.J. Pyatak in Los Angeles, CA.
This recording was Mixed by A.J. Pyatak and John P. Hogan. All songs written by Gregory Charles McKenna and John P. Hogan, except “Writing the Memoir” written by McKenna, Hogan, and David Reich.
Mastered by Carl Saff, Saff Mastering, Chicago, IL. Mastered for vinyl by Paul Gold, Salt Mastering, Brooklyn, NY. All songs ©2010 Vampire Orgasm Music. This has been a Bacchus Face Production.
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