Wank Punter | Unlubricated

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CANADA - Ontario

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Rock: Hard Rock Pop: Power Pop Moods: Mood: Party Music
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by Wank Punter

Rock n' Roll's dirty little secret: Porn Rock. We are like a runaway freight train on a collision course with morality. Simply put, it's music that belongs under your bed.
Genre: Rock: Hard Rock
Release Date: 

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  Song Share Time Download
1. Kirsten Price
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3:27 $0.99
2. Sex Worker
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3:16 $0.99
3. Driver
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3:54 $0.99
4. Captain Cock Block
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3:48 $0.99
5. Fatherly Advice
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4:03 $0.99
6. Back Door Man
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3:17 $0.99
7. Supersize Me
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2:48 $0.99
8. A Girl Like You
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3:21 $0.99
9. Nubian Princess
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4:27 $0.99
10. Cornholio
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5:14 $0.99
11. Curse
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3:13 $0.99
12. Mainstream Is Learning
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3:42 $0.99
13. Go Figure?
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3:51 $0.99
Available as MP3, MP3 320, and FLAC files.


Album Notes
WANK PUNTER - As seen and heard live on Playboy TV and Playboy Radio!!!

People often ask after hearing Wank Punter’s music for the first time, just what are their live shows like? I often cite bands such as the Tubes (their main visual influence) and Frank Zappa/ACDC/The Tubes hybrid with a touch of Van Halen, musically speaking. But they stretch beyond that into pseudo realms of pop punk and ballads too (as well as other playfully mocked genres).

Those who have never heard of The Tubes (or the Plasmatics, for that matter) often seem to have difficulty visualizing this description.

First and foremost, they are a comedy hard rock band that spoofs and satirizes societal taboos. Sex being numero uno, it stands to reason that pretty much all of their material encompasses that particular subject matter. Hence the name: Wank - as in those who have the proclivity for self love, and Punter, those who choose to partake in the hobby of the flesh - ie: your typical John.

As such, the band’s stage presentations tend to border on the outrageous. With some of the archaic laws within Canada and the USA, they occassionally stand the chance of arrest simply from their risque live show performances.

Granted, having barely clothed dancers (The Fluffettes) cavorting on stripper poles and a myriad of other table top surfaces in provocative fashion, crazy things CAN and HAS happened. Thank the good lord that they're only misdemeanors, much akin to a license to do business.

Anyway, aside from looking like a Theatrical Burlesque on Acid, the band is very high energy and obviously enough they don't consider themselves a live band in the typical vein. They're more like a rolling party full of debauchery and mayhem that moves from town to town - the party just happens to drag a slick rock n’ roll band along for the ride.

So... if you're tired of the same old live show that you've been seeing in the clubs for eons, ya gotta check WANK PUNTER out. Be the first to tip your pals about the coolest live show party you've ever experienced - bar none!

Individual member bios:

Feedback • Rythm Guitar/Concept creator/chief composer & lyricist

A Feature Film* score composer turned P.I.M.P. (Professional Internet Marketing Person), Feedback ended up having more girls than consumer demand could accommodate so he started an adult production/distribution company and sold content on the web as a means to keep his girls happy and gainfully employed.

Constantly looking for a way to escape the day-to-day stress of being married to more than a dozen women at a time, he stumbled upon the concept of Wank Punter simply by writing about what he knew best: sex, debauchery, and mayhem.

These days when the band isn't gigging, you can find him kicking back at the Punter Bunker with a Stratocaster, a doobie, a can of coke classic and plotting the band’s next move. Perhaps with a Fluffette or two...

Joey A. Biggapini • Lead Vocals

A slippery character from Greece whose on-stage presence crosses a satanic Sammy Davis with a deranged Dean Martin, Joey is the whirling dirvish we envisioned having as the front man of WANK PUNTER ever since this group of misfits first came together.

He's the "rat" in this "pack" of rock n’ roll screaming reprobates, a charmer, with a chainsaw personality. Not one to be gun-shy for ANY reason, especially when confronted by a half-naked chic with come-hither eyes and street walker boots (and little else to leave to the imagination), Joey is the quintessential showman par excellence!

Without a shadow of a doubt, when you see WANK PUNTER, Joey will leave an indelible impression on your psyche. A loud and proud ladies' man, Joey is THE dude to take WANK PUNTER to the next level and beyond!

Gunner Lingus • Lead Vocals/Keyboards/Piano/Guitar

A child protege by any stretch of the word, Gunner's childhood consisted of piano recitals, solo violin performances, and accordian lessons to boot. Indeed, Weird Al ain't got shit on our Gunner when it comes to having experienced an opressed childhood.

Having said that, Gunner came into his own while having his cherry taken by the neighbor-hood babysitter who just happened to be a very attractive young lady (if not a little messed up due to an emergency frontal lobotomy that's far too long a story to get into here).

Shortly thereafter, dear Gunner became unusually attached to his organ. Indeed, it brought the young man immense pleasure. So much so, he persued it with the passion reserved for only the purest of artistes. And, just as any true artist would do, he went into character by immersing himself within the netherworld of debauchery and sin that is commonly known as peeler bars.

Under the guise of creative research, he gained employment as a DJ and proceeded to pilage the stock of his new found trade. In short, he was perfect for the Punter gang and it wasn't long before he was duly elected as our defacto prima-facie pussy inspector.

All lock, stock and two smoking barrels of British bad behavior, This ex pat is lewd, crude and cannot be subdued. Unless its by some very special lady with amazing skills and several feet of silky rope.

The Discombobulator • Lead Guitar/Acoustic Guitar/Backing Vocals

The silent one, letting the horrifying sounds that emit from his guitar talk in tongues for him. He came from the highlands of Scotland but this lowlife is no bonnie Prince Charlie. Dangerous and deviant, they keep him satiated on stage with unspeakable sacrifices to quench his despicable bloodlust.

Having said that, the Discombobulator is truly a master of the 6 string axe. Wielding it as an extention of his body, he wills the instrument to bend and twist with an aural intensity that is sure to leave women breathless and panting for more and men to stand in awe of the dude's shere wizardy. Hence the name. For anyone who has had the experience of watching and listening to him, the typical reaction is one of stunned, wide-eyed silence.

Not only is he a great musical addition to the band, he's a great decoy to cop a feel off of any unsuspecting chic bearing witness to his magical talents!

Ben F. Driller • Bass Guitar/Backing Vocals

He’s a walking, talking fashion statement. A dedicated follower of haute couture, they considered re-naming the "catwalk" the "benwalk". Everywhere he goes, Ben primps and preens to perfection.

Somewhat jaded, he’s still a tad miffed over an identity theft issue he had with some character named Zoolander but with the attention he’s been receiving as a member of the Punters, we’re certain he’ll get over it.

Chili Polanski • Drums/Percussion

Growing up with a musical influence in the family there's no doubt that Chili is the engine that drives the Wank Punter train. Having played with many notable international recording artists, the dude has some credo and brings a solid foundation to the Wankers.

He’s a frost-bitten Canuck with skin as pure as the driven snow. But a dark heart beats within this man's pasty white chest. He's the one who barks the orders and keeps this unruly gang of misfits on the road. A road that leads straight to rock n’ roll hell.

Sassy Fluff • Aural fixations with Orgasmic Emulations & Visual Stimulation

The center piece of what keeps the guys coming to Punter shows in droves, Sassy is the eye candy that *ahem* fleshes out the band's live show.

This sassy sexpot slipped across the border from Warsaw. She dropped to her knees in gratitude, and rarely got up. The local boys in the western world were delighted to teach her English, but it was in French that she excelled. Blowing away the Competition, Sassy finally hooked up with Feedback to become the lead Fluffette. And she’s been taking one for the team ever since.


to write a review

spirit of radio

It's got it all...but not to excess
What a great collection of songs from a bunch of unheard ofs!! It's one of those albums that is over before you know it. The songs are funny, catchy and well played without being repetitive. A very refreshing change from a lot of what is being produced lately.

Martin Farrant

Buy It
PC speakers cannot do justice to the top class music on this CD. A bit rude yes, but you have to hear it on your hi fi LOUD. Just buy it then you'll know.