Art Paul Schlosser | Songs I Forgot That The Elephant Remembered

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Songs I Forgot That The Elephant Remembered

by Art Paul Schlosser

Here are several experimental songs using different intruments and guitar styles and also some jokes
Genre: Jazz: Jive
Release Date: 

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1. I Don't Want to Be Cool Art Paul Schlosser
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2. Hollywood Bell Art Paul Schlosser
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3. If I Kissed You ? Art Paul Schlosser
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4. My Rocking Chair Has No Arms Blues Art Paul Schlosser
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5. Advice Art Paul Schlosser
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6. Do You Wonder Art Paul Schlosser
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7. Sound Check Song Art Paul Schlosser
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8. Elvis Burger Joke Art Paul Schlosser
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9. Just 3 Words Art Paul Schlosser
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10. Slapple Art Paul Schlosser
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11. My Girl Friends So Old Art Paul Schlosser
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12. Salesman Art Paul Schlosser
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13. She's So Cute Art Paul Schlosser
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14. You Don't Gotta Art Paul Schlosser
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15. I Saw Her Art Paul Schlosser
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16. In Her Name With Love Art Paul Schlosser
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17. Passing the Buck Art Paul Schlosser
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18. Your Music's Too Loud Art Paul Schlosser
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19. I'm Glad Were Through Art Paul Schlosser
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20. Adam On the Juice Harp Adam
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21. Politics Sucks Blues Art Paul Schlosser
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22. Jesus Is the Joy If You Got the Blues Art Paul Schlosser
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23. I've Got the Blues (Special Version With Drums) Art Paul Schlosser
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24. Your the Only Dandelion in My Whole World(live From the Radio) Art Paul Schlosser
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25. Tom Dooley Art Paul Schlosser
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26. Angeline Art Paul Schlosser
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27. Shall the Circle Be Unbroken Art Paul Schlosser
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28. Letz Danze (Live From the Radio) Art Paul Schlosser
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29. My Cat Was Taking a Bath Art Paul Schlosser
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30. Scream ! Art Paul Schlosser
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ABOUT THIS ALBUM


Album Notes
So I'm going through tapes that are not on CD yet and I discovered some extra songs that just didn't fill up a whole CD, and I thought they should be availible because they are pretty good songs.Then I was going through other stuff and found some other weird recordings and one song I thought was pretty neat is number 23 because it is the first and only time I recorded myself backing myself. It was recorded by some nice guy I forgot his name but he recorded me for free.It's me on guitar and also on drums.Also you might like the interview with Adam the Juice Harp performer. Adam recorded me at his apartment but I never released it because it was recorded on cassette tape and just didn't sound as good as recording on reel at Randy's recording.So I was wondering what to call this and Robert Monthey said call it Songs I Forgot That The Elephant Remembered.

Here are some of the lyrics:


1. I Don’t Want To Be Cool

I don't want to be cool
I just want to be me
There are many who do
They're not really free

I don't want to be cool
But I'm willing to see
Just what you do
If cool you could be

Smoking Cigarettes
Taste bad to me
Driving real fast
Is living dangerously
Doing lots of drugs
Has proven deadly
If that's being cool
Than I'd rather be me
Buying lots of clothes
To look like others do
Spending lots of cash
And going broke too
Your not pleasing yourself
Your just trying to be cool
I’d rather shop at goodwill
Than be a fool

Not everything that’s cool
Is really cool
Find out if
It’s safe to
Don’t do everything
The other people do
If they jumped off a cliff
Would you jump too

2.Hollywood Bell

1.She got in her car and she drove on down the road
She didn't look back because she didn't want to know
Her boyfriend thought she was waiting for him at the bar
But she's going to Hollywood to be a movie star

*Chorus: Star-Star Rider
Flying ever higher
Is this really what you desire ?
To be a Star-Star Rider

2.Well she met up with a director who knew about a part
And she did whatever it took-whatever it took to be a star
Her first movie sold real well
And she changed her name to Hollywood Bell*

3.You know how it is with some people
What's good they don't know and what's really good they really don't know
She threw away the things she had back at home
Now she has no friends,no boyfriend,no family-she's all alone


3.If I Kissed You

If I kissed you would it be a sin
If I kissed you and I held your hand
If I kissed you would you hate me then
If I kissed you and I held your hand

I love you and I want to kiss you to
I love you and I want to kiss you to

Yesterday
Yesterday
Yesterday

Yesterday
Yesterday
What a lovely day

I don’t understand
I don’t understand, I don’t understand

I don’t understand
I don’t understand just where you stand

I want to be your friend, I want to be your boyfriend
I want to be your friend, I want to be your boyfriend


4. My Rocking Chair Has No arm Blues
My rocking chair has no arm blues
It sits around and collects dust, and it don’t work too
My rocking chair has no arm blues
I tried to fix it once, we didn’t have enough glue
My rocking chair has no arm blues

My rocking chair has no arm blues
Every time I sit down, I fall over too
My rocking chair has no arm blues
It makes me so depressed, but I’m too cheap to buy tools
My rocking chair has no arm blues

My rocking chair has no arm blues
When you want to sit, you know you’ve got to pay your dues
My rocking chair has no arm blues
And when you brake your back they send some bills to you
My rocking chair has no arm blues

5.Advice

Everyone’s got a vice
So here’s my advice
That if you’ve got a vice
You shouldn’t give advice
About how other people should give up their vice
Cause you’ve got a vice

6. Do You Wonder

When words don’t make sense

When meanings are unclear

When you don’t understand

When things don’t go as planned

Do you wonder?
Do you wonder?
Do you wonder?
Do you wonder?

7. Sound Check Song

This is the song I wrote for the sound check
This is the song I wrote to make feedback
This is the song I wrote for the sound check
Hope you like it
Hey I just wrote it
Hope you like it
Don't
misquote it
This is the song I wrote for the sound check
This is the song I wrote to make feedback


8.Elvis Burger Joke

Have you ever had an Elvis Burger ? Well you know have you ever had one of those Elvis sandwiches with the peanut butter and the bananas ? You know thats Elvis 's favorite sandwich. Well an Elvis burger is the same thing only it has a hamburger as well. See you've got peanut butter and bananas and the burger.


9. Just Three Words

Just
Three
Words

Just
Three
Words

Just Three Words
Just Three Words
Just Three Words
Just Three Words

Just
Three
Words

10.Slapple

Have you ever had the new soft drink called slapple ?
No I don't mean snapple, but slapple.
You open up the bottle and a hand comes out and slaps you in the face.

11. My Girlfriend’s So Old

My girlfriend's so old
She knew Lincoln when he was a boy
My girlfriend's so old
She knew Helen before Troy
We go to church to play bingo
She likes to drink prune juice
And when Franky sings a jingle
She really admires his suit

My girlfriend's so old
She baked cookies for Napoleon
My girlfriend's so old
When she was young, she visited the Pilgrims
She took me to a Charlie Chapin film festival
She really likes to watch Lawrence Welk
And at night when she can't sleep at all
She drinks warm milk

My girlfriend's so old
So old you won't believe
My girlfriend's so old
Hey, did I tell you her name's Eve

12. Salesman

Why don’t you leave me alone
I don’t want no crummy buys
Why don’t you leave me alone
I don’t want no insurance lies

Salesman, salesman
Knocking on my door
Salesman, salesman
Bothering me some more

Ring, ring goes the telephone
I hurry up to answer it
Ring, ring goes the telephone
Salesman trying to get my credit

Salesman, salesman
Knocking on my door
Salesman, salesman
Bothering me some more

We know your in there

13. She’s So Cute

She's so cute
But she knows it too
She's so cute
I don't know
I don't know
What to
Do,do,do

She's so cute
But she knows it too
She's so cute
I don't know
I don't know
What to
Do,do,do

Do you
Do you like her too
Do you
I thought it was true


14. You Don’t Gotta

You don't gotta take that drug
You don't gotta take that drug
Just because you think you might like it

You don't gotta take that drug
You don't gotta take that drug
No the doctor never did prescribe it

You don't gotta take that drug
You don't gotta take that drug
Just because your friend said it was cool

You don't gotta take that drug
You don't gotta take that drug
No they never said what the bad effects would do
And all along you thought it was alright
You never thought it lead to death
But now your bodies on it's last flight
Was it really best

You don't gotta take that drug
You don't gotta take that drug
Just because you think you might like it

You don't gotta take that drug
You don't gotta take that drug
No the doctor never did prescribe it

15. I Saw Her

I saw her
I saw her
At the parade

I saw her
I saw her
she look like she needed a shave

I don't mind
I don't mind
Women in suits

I don't mind
I don't mind
Army boots

But there's something
Something
About a beard

On woman
On Woman
It looks weird

I saw her
I saw her
At the convent

I saw her
I saw her
Her knees where bent

I don't mind
I don't mind
Woman who pray

I don't mind
I don't mind
Going to church everyday

But there's something
Something
About dating a nun

You know you can't
You know you can't
Can't kiss them

I saw her
I saw her
In the police car

I saw her
I saw her
Arrest people at the bar

I don't mind
I don't mind
Woman cops

I don’t mind
I don’’t mind
When they say stop

But there's something
Something
About a female officer

You know when you go out
When you go out
You better not jaywalk around her

16. In Her Name With Love

In her name with love
That's what she wanted me to say
In her name with love
On the radio the other day

She wanted the whole world to know
That I love her so
But when I said I wouldn't
She had such a fit

In her name with love
But she wouldn't even give me a kiss
In her name with love
How could she expect this

But if she's listening out there
I still-I still care
But I'm not gonna make a big display
That's not my way

In her name with love
That's what she does wish
In her name with love
Kazoo--------

17. Passing The Buck

Hey let's play
Passing the buck
That's when you say
To others good luck

Make them go
To someone else
Passing the buck
Is really swell

Passing the buck
That's what you do
Make other's help
But not you

Passing the buck
But what will you do
When they pass the buck
Right back to you

Politicians,lawyers
Preachers too
Passing the buck
Is really cool

You don't want to
Give up any of that wealth
Pass the buck
To someone else

Passing the buck
That's what you do
Make other's help
But not you

Passing the buck
But what will you do
When they pass the buck
Right back to you


18. Your Music’s Too Loud

Your music's too loud
I can't sleep
Your music's too loud
Shut that dog up

Your music's too loud
I can't sleep
Your music's too loud
It's 3 o'clock in the morning
It's 3 o'clock in the morning

Don’t want to be a grouch
I’m just trying to sleep
Don’t want to be a grouch
Shut that dog up

Don’t want to be a grouch
I’m just trying to sleep
Don’t want to be a grouch
It's 3 o'clock in the morning
It's 3 o'clock in the morning

19. I’m Glad We’re Through

I miss you darling
You know it’s so
Do I want you back ?
I just don’t know

I miss you darling
You know it’s so
But some how Darling
I’m glad you did go

You never offer me
So very much
But poison
And knifes to touch

Every time my back was turned
There you were
With earthquakes
And volcano erupture

And remember all those guys
You said we’re friends
Some how sleeping in bed
Don’t mean friends

I miss you darling
You know I do
But somehow darling
I’m glad we’re through

I said I miss you darling
You know I do
But I miss even more
My life before I knew you

Ha-ha-Ha-ha, Ha-ha-Ha-ha
Ha-ha-Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha ha

Ha-ha-Ha-ha, Ha-ha-Ha-ha
Ha-ha-Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha ha

I’m sick of the lies,
I’m sick of the pain
I’m sick of the headaches
And going insane

Oh I know you love me,
And that you were true
I just some how wonder
About those other 2

So I won’t write you
And I won’t call you
In fact Darling
I’m glad we're through

Okay now everybody out there listen to me
Sing it with me:
Ha-ha-Ha-ha, Ha-ha-Ha-ha
Ha-ha-Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha ha

Ha-ha-Ha-ha, Ha-ha-Ha-ha
Ha-ha-Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha ha

Ha-ha-Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha ha

My head feels heavy

20. Adam on the Juice Harp

Art Paul:Oh ah I wanted to introduce you to my friend Adam. Adam gonna be playing his juice harp. Oh that's a drag did that hurt Adam ? Are we recording this right now ? Oh I'm sorry. Hey we're recording this I'm sorry for-
Adam: You can start anytime.
Art Paul:Are we ready to go ?
Adam: We're ready
Art Paul:Okay push it we'll record
Adam: Oh it's been recording
Art Paul:Oh it has I'm sorry I didn't we we're recording. Okay I'm Art, and I'll let Adam. Adams gonna play his juice harp here.
Juice Harp~~~~~~~~~
Art Paul: Okay that's enough Adam. What is it like to be a juice harp player Adam ?
Adam:Well it's not that hard. It's only when it hits your teeth that it's hard. so um I just a I'll rise above it.I continue to play professionally and I like it.
Art Paul:Do you think there's hope for other juice harp players out there ?
Adam:No I've seen alot of juice harp players come and go and it takes a special breed really. You just got to stick with it and hope that your teeth don't chip off.And if they do that's okay because you really don't need them.
Art Paul:Okay well that's enough I can't I don't have anymore time for you on my show Adam I've got to do this song.
Adam: Come On Art.
Art Paul: Oh okay
Adam starts to play
Art Paul:That's enough Adam
We did we let you play some now I'm gonna do this.

21. Politics Sucks Blues


Politician, politician why do you tell lies
Politician, politician why do you tell lies
You promise us this, promise us that then you change your mind


City Lawyer, city lawyer taking bribes on the side
City Lawyer, city lawyer taking bribes on the side
Your suppose to stand for truth and justice but the truth you compromise

Government, government why do you oppress
Government, government why do you oppress
Well you say you going to help us out then you help us less and less

Politician, politician why do you tell lies
Politician, politician why do you tell lies
Well the facts are right before you still you deny

I’ve got the politics, politics sucks and I know it blues
I’ve got the politics, politics sucks and I know it blues
Well every time you think your going to get somewhere in the end you really get screwed

Juice Harp ~~~~~

Well let's see it's legislators, legislators their making all those rules
Legislators, legislators their making all those rules
They make rules and rules and then they make the rules for the rules

Taxation, taxation almost everywhere
Taxation, taxation almost everywhere
They tax the water, tax the land, pretty soon their going to tax the air

America, America the home of the free
America, America the home of the free
Where you got to buy a license if you want your liberty

Politician, politician your acting like you're our friend
Politician, politician your acting like you're our friend
Yeah you come to visit us so you can screw us once again

I’ve got the politics, politics sucks and I know it blues
Politics, politics sucks and I know it blues
Every time you think your going to get somewhere, you really get screwed

Oh Yeah

22. Jesus is the Joy if you Got the Blues


Jesus is the Joy if you've got the BLues (oh Yeah)
Jesus is the Joy,you know it's true (oh Yeah)
Jesus is the Joy if you've got the BLues (oh Yeah)
Just start to Praise Him (oh Yeah)
Feel Joy within (oh Yeah)
Jesus is the Joy if you've got the BLues (oh Yeah)

Jesus is the Peace if strife won't cease (oh yeah)
You know he's going to give you Release (oh yeah)
Jesus is the Peace if strife won't cease (oh yeah)
Just start to Praise Him (oh Yeah)
Feel Peace within (oh Yeah)
Jesus is the Peace when strife won't cease (oh Yeah)

Jesus is the Love that your in need of
Jesus is the Love coming down from Above (Yeah)
Jesus is the Love that your in need of
Just start to Praise Him (Yeah)
Feel Love within (Yeah)
Jesus is the Love that your in need of

Oh you know it
Oh Yeah
Oh Yeah he’ll give you love
Yeah right deep inside your heart

Jesus is the Joy when you've got the BLues (oh Yeah)
Jesus is the Joy,you know it's true (oh Yeah)
Jesus is the Joy if you've got the BLues (Oh Yeah)
Just start to Praise Him(oh Yeah)
Feel Joy within (oh Yeah)
Jesus is the Joy when you've got the BLues (oh Yeah)

Oh Yeah

23. I’ve Got The Blues

I’ve got the blues
Got the blues
I’ve got the blues
I’m all blue hoo hoo hoo hoo
I’ve got the blues
Got the blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues

It’s Sunday
Or it’s Monday
Or it’s Tuesday
Or it’s Wednesday
Or It’s Thursday
Or it’s Friday
Or it’s Saturday
Saturday
Saturday
Saturday
Saturday
Saturday all the time

Well some people
They get the reds
And some people
Turn all green
Or some people
Just turn orange
Or something in between yeah
Something in between

But I get the blues
I get the blues
I get the blues
I’m all blue hoo hoo hoo hoo
I get the blues
I get the blues
I’m blue
Blue
Blue
Blue
Blue
Blue
Blue

Well I’m depressed
Yeah I’m depressed
I got up
To get dressed
But all I could find
Was a dress
I’m depressed
Oppressed
Distressed
To excess
I’m just depressed

Well I went up
To this Hippy dude
I was thinking
He could help me out
I said Do you think you could spare a dollar
He said peace, love, get a job
Peace, love, get a job

I’ve got the blues
I've got the blues
I’ve got the blues
I’m all blue hoo hoo hoo hoo
I’ve got the blues
Got the blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues

Well my girlfriend
She’s got red hair
But last week
It was black
And yesterday
It was green
And tomorrow
Tomorrow
Tomorrow
Tomorrow
Tomorrow it’ll be blue


Well my girlfriend
She don’t go out with me
She went out
With my brother
And she went out
With my best friend
And she went out
With My Father
My Father
My Father
She went out with my Father and their married

I’ve got the blues
Got the blues
I’ve got the blues
I’m all blue hoo hoo hoo hoo
I’ve got the blues
Got the blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues

Well I get the blues
Oh I get the blues
Oh Yes
It’s True
And they can happen
To you
And the President he gets them too
The President gets them too


Blah blah blah
Blab blab blab
Wowwwww !
Gosh
Gosh
Oh ee owe yeah
Owe ee oh

I get the blues
I get the blues
I got the blues
I got the blues
I’m really blue
I’m really blue
I’m blue
I’m blue
I’m blue
I’m blue
I’m blue
I’m blue
I’m blue

Some people say
The Grass is greener
On the other side of the fence
Well went over there
To check it out
I found snake snakes weeds weeds
Weeds snakes snakes

Well the morrow of
The story is
Be content with what you’ve got
If you can’t be content
Be prepared for the punishment
Be prepared for the punishment

I’ve got the blues
Got the blues
I’ve got the blues
I’m all blue hoo hoo hoo hoo
I’ve got the blues
Got the blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues

Well a friend of mine
Has a car
You know sometimes
It actually starts
And sometimes
It stalls
And sometimes we’ve got to walk real far
Sometimes we’ve got walk real far

Well I guess this
Is the end of my song
But if I decide
To change my mind
Won’t mean that life
Is any easier
Just means I decided not to give up
Just means I decided not to give up

Now if there is any reason
Why I should quit this song
Please raise your hand
For if you like
I’ll play it all night long
Or at least until you go bizerk
Or at least until you go bizerk



You’ll get the blues
Get the blues
You’ll get the blues
You’ll be all blue hoo hoo hoo hoo
You’ll get the blues
You get the blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The blues
The bluess
The blues

24. You’re the Only Dandelion in my Whole World

You're the only dandelion in my whole world
You're the only dandelion in my whole world
You're the only dandelion in my whole world
I don’t want pick another flower
I don’t want pick another flower

I’ve seen tulips and daffodils
I’ve seen roses and marigolds
I’ve seen voilets and daisys
But none of them drew me that crazy
None of them drew me that crazy

I’ve been all over this great big world
I’ve been to weddings and funerals
I seen all sorts of odd girls
But none of them look like heros
None of them look like heros

She’s the only dandelion in my whole world
She’s the only dandelion in my whole world
She’s the only dandelion in my whole world
I don’t want pick another flower
I don’t want pick another flower

25. Tom Dooley

Hang down your head, Tom Dooley
Hang down your head and cry
Hang your head, Tom Dooley
Poor boy you're bound to die

You killed poor Laurie Foster
You know it's not a lie
You killed poor Laurie Foster
Poor boy you're bound to die

You thought you'd get away with it
But you know you couldn’t hide
You thought you'd get away with it
Poor boy you're bound to die

Thank You

26.Angeline

Angeline
Angeline
Like Jello green
With whip cream
I love my Angeline

Angeline
Angeline
She is a dream
And a Queen
My Angeline

Angeline
Angeline
A gave her a ring
But she sold it for the cash

Angeline
Angeline
My skin just turned green
Your love gives me a rash

I was paddling paddling paddling paddling my boat to your house

I was paddling paddling paddling paddling my boat when I saw you already had a spouse

Angeline
Angeline
What does this mean ?
Hey I'm in doubt ?

Angeline
Angeline
What does this mean ?
Will we still go out ?

I was paddling paddling paddling paddling my boat and there was a hole in the boat

I was paddling paddling paddling paddling my boat blub blub blub blub

27. Shall the Circle Be Unbroken

I was standing by the station
On a cold and cloudy day
When I saw the hearse come rollin'
For to take my mother away.

Shall the circle be unbroken?
By and by lord, by and by,
There's a better home a-waitin'
In the sky lord, in the sky.

Well I told the undertaker:
Undertaker, please drive slow,
For this body you are haulin'
Lord, I hate to see her go

Shall the circle be unbroken?
By and by lord, by and by,
There's a better home a-waitin'
In the sky lord, in the sky

Well I followed close behind her,
Tried to hold up and be brave,
But I could not hide my sorrow
When they laid her in the grave

Shall the circle be unbroken?
By and by lord, by and by,
There's a better home a-waitin'
In the sky lord, in the sky

28. Letz Danze

Letz danze
Letz danze
Letz danze
You’ve got antz in your pantz
Letz danze

Letz danze
D-d-danze
Letz danze
Yeah you think your from Franze
Letz danze

Letz danze
D-d-danze
Letz danze
Out your ear are 6 plantz
Letz danze

D-d danze
D-d danze
Danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze, danze
Your in a psychedelic tranze
Letz danze

29. My Cat Was Taking A Bath

1. I was riding home late one night
When there in my house I saw a light
And when I got inside
Right before my very eyes

Chorus: My cat was taking a bath
My cat was taking a bath
It was a quarter to 3
And I don't believe
My cat was taking a bath

2.Well maybe I had something to drink
Or maybe I just couldn't quite think
But my ma saw it too
And she said of course it's true (go back to chorus)


30.

The name of the song is scream
And that’s what I mean scream
You think it’s kind of keen
Come on and scream

Some people sound like this
Some people sound like this
Some people sound like this
Some people sound like this

Deep in the jungle you find
It’s kind of scary sometimes
Creatures aren’t very kind
That’s the screaming time

The name of the song is scream
And that’s what I mean scream
You think it’s kind of keen
Come on and scream


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