Fred Frees | Affirmations for Cats: Ringtones, Text Messages & Furry Voicemail Sound Bytes Vol. 1

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United States - Georgia

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Spoken Word: Comedy Spoken Word: Instructional Moods: Mood: Funny
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Affirmations for Cats: Ringtones, Text Messages & Furry Voicemail Sound Bytes Vol. 1

by Fred Frees

Give your tabby the great gift of uplifting, positive messages!
Genre: Spoken Word: Comedy
Release Date: 

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Tracks

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1. I Love Myself. I Love My Fat Ass.
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0:32 $0.99
2. I Could Stare Out of the Window All Day.
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0:35 $0.99
3. Dogs Do Not Exist. They Don't.
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0:33 $0.99
4. My Life Is Full. My Hair Is Tuft.
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0:32 $0.99
5. I Have the Potential for Everything.
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0:32 $0.99
6. Today I Will Accomplish - Nothing. Nothing!
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0:34 $0.99
7. Look At Those Squirrels. I Own Them All!
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0:34 $0.99
8. I Have a Sense of Humor. I Just Choose Eating.
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0:31 $0.99
9. I Love Litter. I Don't Have to Clean It.
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0:34 $0.99
10. Oh, I Am Beautiful. I Am Hairy.
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0:30 $0.99
11. Night Is My Element. Egypt Is My Whatever.
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0:31 $0.99
12. My Clowder Is Tabby. We Are Strong Like Pudge.
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0:35 $0.99
13. Catnip Does Not Control Me. I Control Catnip.
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0:36 $0.99
14. I Am Off Catnip. I Am Strong.
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0:32 $0.99
15. I Am Not a Pussy. I Am a Cat.
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0:31 $0.99
16. I Am Domestic. Long Haired. Feral.
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0:34 $0.99
17. No One Owns Me.
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0:34 $0.99
18. I Will Not Have Kittens. I Am Not Afraid.
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0:34 $0.99
19. I Am Not Self-Conscious About the Hair in My Ears.
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0:31 $0.99
20. I Will Not Have Kittens. I Need No One Else.
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0:31 $0.99
21. Cat Food Is Not Dirty. It Tastes… Good.
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0:35 $0.99
22. I Don't Need Anybody. Just a Box On the Floor.
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0:31 $0.99
23. Today I Will Be #1 On Youtube. My Ranking Will Improve.
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0:31 $0.99
24. I Love Myself. Myself. Myself!
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0:35 $0.99
25. I Could Lick Myself All Day.
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0:31 $0.99
26. Whatever Happens: Happens. Let the Tigers Worry.
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0:34 $0.99
27. I Can Hardly Keep My Hairy Eyes Open. and I Love It.
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0:31 $0.99
28. Life Is Like a Scoop of Litter. Some Days There Are Clumps. Some Days There Are Sparkles.
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0:29 $0.99
29. In My Next Life I Will Be a Cat.
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0:35 $0.99
30. Today My Food Will Be from a Can.
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0:33 $0.99
31. There Are No Dogs. There Is Only Sleep.
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0:34 $0.99
32. I Own This World. I Own You All.
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0:30 $0.99
33. Today Is the First Day of the Rest of My Sleep.
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0:34 $0.99
34. I Am Beautiful. I Am Fantastic.
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0:34 $0.99
35. I Am No One's Pet. I Own Me.
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0:29 $0.99
36. I Am Not Wearing a Collar. I'm Wearing Nothing Today.
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0:34 $0.99
37. I Purr to Please Myself.
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0:33 $0.99
38. There Should Be Hair Between My Toes.
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0:32 $0.99
39. I Will Purr More.
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0:33 $0.99
40. Hair Is My 5 a Day.
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0:31 $0.99
41. (Text Message) This Is Your Cat. Leave a Message and I May Look Into It.
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0:11 $0.99
42. (Text Message) Text Message? What Are You, Like, 12?
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43. (Text Message) Playing With the Little Light Right Now. Leave a Message.
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0:11 $0.99
44. (Text Message) Meow, Man.
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0:11 $0.99
45. (Text Message) Cat Is Sleeping. Text Me.
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0:11 $0.99
46. (Hairy Voicemail) You Have Reached Your Pussy, Cat.
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0:11 $0.99
47. (Hairy Voicemail) Pussy Cat, Pussy Cat, I Am Your Pussy Cat.
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0:11 $0.99
48. (Hairy Voicemail) Hi. Nice to Hear from You. But I'm in the Litter Box Right Now. a Little Privacy?
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0:12 $0.99
49. (Hairy Voicemail) I've Got Hair in My Mouth. I'm Gonna Have to Call You Back.
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0:11 $0.99
50. (Hairy Voicemail) Thanks for Calling, But It's Actually Mating Season Right Now. Leave a Message.
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0:06 $0.99
preview all songs

ABOUT THIS ALBUM


Album Notes
Is your cat in desperate need of uplifting ringtones? Of course she is!
Give your tabby the great gift of positive messages like:

I love myself. I love my fat ass.
Today is the day I ignore the little red light.
I can fit thru the front door. I will.
My life is full. My hair is tuft.
I am not a pussy. I am a cat.
Today is the first day of the rest of my sleep!
Today my food will be from a can.

50 choice morsels to download and lick and savor!

Plus, a litter box full of Fuzzy Text Message Greetings,
including:

This is your cat. Leave a message and I may look into it.
Playing with the little light right now. Leave a message.

Plus, 5 different Hairy Voicemail Greetings, such as:

Hi. Nice to hear from you. But I'm in the litter box right now. A little privacy?
I've got hair in my mouth. I'm gonna have to call you back.

Give your cat the positive affirmations he or she or it deserves! Direct from acclaimed voice actor Fred Frees comes heartwarming, mouse-smelling Cat Talk the whole family can enjoy!


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