Foul-mouthed mother from hell Karen Matthews is fed up being a nobody until she hatches a cunning plan for a shot at the big time.
Henpecked common-law husband Craig Meehan has a secret interest that nobody knows about.
Borderline special needs uncle Michael Donovan just wants a bit of company and a couple of quid for some baccy.
Stereotypical Yorkshire copper Detective Inspector Radgitt faces a race against time to get to the bottom of this case and find the missing girl, Shannon Matthews, aged 9.
This is Shannon Matthews: The Musical, a foul-mouthed romp through one of the most bizarre news stories of recent years, brought to you from the writers of Kunt and the Gang.
Definitely not for the easily offended.