Schaffer The Darklord | Meet My Maker

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United States - NY - New York City

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Hip-Hop/Rap: Alternative Hip Hop Spoken Word: Comedy Moods: Mood: Funny
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Meet My Maker

by Schaffer The Darklord

Rap songs and stand-up comedy delivered by a jaded rock and roll ex-patriot.
Genre: Hip-Hop/Rap: Alternative Hip Hop
Release Date: 

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  Song Share Time Download
1. I am Schaffer The Darklord
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4:22 $0.99
2. Serious Metal
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0:39 $0.99
3. Your Band
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3:46 $0.99
4. Attack of the Clonefucker
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4:43 $0.99
5. Pure Evil
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2:23 $0.99
6. Dedication
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0:53 $0.99
7. The Heckler
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3:37 $0.99
8. Black Metal Queen
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5:28 $0.99
9. Enter Soundman
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3:58 $0.99
10. The Rhyme of Lord Nordak
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4:07 $0.99
11. Eeing
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0:25 $0.99
12. Black Condom
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0:45 $0.99
13. Quel Que Chose
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3:12 $0.99
Available as MP3, MP3 320, and FLAC files.


Album Notes
Schaffer the Darklord (or STD) is an entertainer from New York with an act comprised of rap songs and stand-up comedy. From his many years as a drummer in groups like SF-based noise metal behemoths Burmese, STD harvests material dealing with sex, drugs, and rock bands. Imagine a Frankenstein-esque creature assembled from equal parts Prince, Ozzy Osbourne, Bill Hicks, Eminem, and Darth Vader...all rolled into a jaded rock and roll ex-patriot, covering topics from Jesus zombies to post-apocalyptic clone sex. It is advised that you see his act before he is consumed by his own wickedness.


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this album is tons of fun! we listen to it at work when we need cheering up. STD is a very unique and skillful musician and comedian. i think with this type of artist, its hard to find an album in which there's more than just a select few hits. STD really stands apart from the rest that way. its one of those albums i'm anxious to turn friends onto cuz its so much fun- a rare, little-known gem. i really like that some tracks are from live shows cuz it gives you an idea of how fun his performances must be. i can't wait for the opportunity to see him live. the way he interacts with the audience sounds really entertaining. so get some STD today! it's fun!

MC Cheshire Grin

What can I say?
It\'s really hard to find fault in this album. Sure you can knock some of the production but honestly just listen to the rhymes and be effin\' amazed. He has an amazing flow and his wit is unparalleled. My favorite thing about Schaffer is that even on record you can hear how good he is on stage. His energy in the studio is surpassed only in a venue.

Jess Beauchamp

This is a great record. Original and fresh. Not many can say they are pioneers in the comedy or hip hop genres but, Schaffer The Darklord is definately a visionary. The combination of his slightly askew lyrics and the manner in which they are delivered is a bretah of fresh air. Man can this Lord of the perverse deliver. If you haven't heard what STD has to offer. Do yourself a favor and buy Meet Your Maker today and you too shall be infected.


Schaffer makes my nipples hard
I adore how there's a category on CDBaby for "white-boy rap."

This CD contains some classic STD (Schaffer the Darklord) material, including, of course, "Attack of the Clonefucker," and one of my favorites, "Black Metal Queen."

"The Rhyme of Lord Nordak" is also possibly the fastest and most verbose white-boy rap song ever created.

This CD is extremely amusing, quite listenable, makes an extremely (possibly inappropriately) memorable gift, and, if you were evaluating it on a words-per-dollar basis, a fantastic deal. This white boy can write.

Derek C. F. Pegritz (aka White Chocolate)

Mad Skillz!
Schaffer the Darklord's Meet My Maker is, beyond any shadow of a doubt, THE best hip-hop record I've heard this year. In fact, it may well be one of the five BEST hip-hop records I've ever heard.

This CD is the bizzy-bomb for two reasons:

1) STD is hysterically funny--and not just in the scatological or stand-up sense. My boy's got some serious wit to him: wit of the oldskool Juvenalian sort that is both funny *and* smart. Witness "Black Metal Queen" which is not only a laughable account of hitting on a black-metal chick but is also a wicked little commentary on how fucking ridiculous exclusivist musical "scenes" are.

2) STD has Mad Skillz(tm). "Attack of the Clonefucker" features some of the most amazing rhymes I've ever heard in hip-hop, and STD's machine-gun delivery on "The Rhyme of Lord Nordak" makes even Eminem's most convoluted flow sound like Ol' Dirty Bastard mumbling incoherently into microcassette recorder.

You want to hear catchy, memorable hip-hop that will knock you down with its faster-than-light rhymes? Then hail Satan, peons! This is the only album you need.

Lee's Summit Wiffleball League

Meet My Maker Not Dark, But The Light of Hip-Hop
Meet My Maker is one of the most original cd's to come out of the hip-hop scene since the new millineum. This album and artist understands that there is more to hip-hop than women, though Dark Metal Queen is an awesomely original song about the opposite sex. Highlights include attack of the Clonefucker, Dark Metal Queen, Schaffer the Darklord, and Quel Que Chose. If you are tired of the cRAP that is out there now check this album out and realize there is still hope in hip-hop!


I have an unhealthy obsession for both this man and his music. Buy this cd today; it will not disappoint. :D